My theory on the death of brain cells

Where, exactly, in the body to brain cells go when they die? Mine are noticeably dropping dead at an alarming rate. My theory is that those dead brain cells enter my diabetic blood stream, and my system does not know what to do with them, so it just does what it does with everything else, and turns it into fat. Yes. Fat. Particularly the kind that hangs around my stomach. And I DO mean 'hangs'.

I have noticed lately, that this dearth of dying brain cells is showing up in my inability to spell. In the fifth grade, I was NEVER less than the third one chosen for a spelling bee. Now, I can't even get spellcheck to recognize what word I am trying to spell. And my fingers keep getting letters out of order as I type. I cannot begin to tell you how many times I type 'who' when I mean 'how', or...more recently 'glob' when what I actually mean to spell is 'blog'. Of course, spellcheck does not pick those up, so I basically look like an idiot.

Also, when I do a crossword puzzle, I can no longer remember those simple words that appear over and over again. Like 'obi'.

BUT, I NEVER forget things that are profoundly embarrassing! They just keep dancing through my head, probably stomping all over the dying 'spelling' brain cells on their way to causing me to laugh uproariously at inopportune times.

Then, I have a different sort of 'fear' brain cell, that will suddenly remind me that I am doing something (anything...it doesn't matter what) in public - which of course means in front of actual living breathing human beings. Those brain cells will then choose to die right there, and I will be left sitting at a piano in front of people who are singing, and I no longer remember how to play. Thankfully, I still have a few 'lets try to keep this woman from looking like a complete idiot' brain cells, that will kindly rush over and fill in for the now dead 'fear' of piano playing ones. But, there is an obvious gap in the song.

Even worse, is asking someone a question. They answer in good time, yet the answer makes no sense to me, as I have already forgotten the question. My 'lets try to keep this woman from looking like a complete idiot' brain cells are being greatly overworked, and soon will commit mass suicide. Then where will I be?

Worst of all, my mother is suffering from dementia. One of the little quizzes the medical community pops on these people is counting backwards from 100 by sevens. Even in my days of scoring very well on tests, I could NEVER just count backwards from 100 by sevens. So, when I remember this...I practice. So far I can get from 100 to 93 without too much trouble. And, just to make things worse for ME, my mother can do it!

Anyway, that's my theory and I'm sticking to it because I have the fat around my middle to prove it!