THGGM took some vacation time this week. He is off until Tuesday. Monday he will take my dad to have his leg x-rayed. We are praying that the bone has healed. Today THGGM and I took Baby Boy out on an adventure to the Meijer Gardens. We had a wonderful time (see the posts below for proof).
It was such a fun day, and just the thing to do to shake off winter for good.
Then this evening I stopped at my parents house to bring my dad some prescriptions he was about to run out of.
My mom met me at the door. She told me that she was ready to go home. A pile of her clothes sat neatly folded on the couch. She told me that this was a nice place, but they could not stay any longer. Then she looked at the couch and said, 'I guess some of our stuff is already here, so we must be coming back, and it IS a nice place, but I want to go home.'
I just wanted to cry. She has lived there for eight years.
Sometimes it feels that if I am on the happy end of the teeter-totter, someone will drop something on the sad end and I will be propelled through the air.
At other times, I'm on the sad end, and something happy will fall and sail me towards the heavens.
I need to find the fulcrum, crawl my way to it if I have to, so that whatever befalls - happy or sad, I will remain secure.
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8 comments:
Oh dear, Judy...so sorry to hear this, but I guess it is not exactly unexpected...but we are never ready to have this sort of thing happen, are we? Blessings on you, dear...the last time I saw my mom she gave not one shred of recognition that she knew me (the oldest child even), called me "that girl"...to my dad. For me, she actually died then, though her body continued on awhile longer. Oh the joys that await us in the portals of the KING someday however...all will be well again...these things are only temporary! If we can only keep sight of that as we transverse the grief of it all. ((((((((((HUGS))))))))
I'm sitting on the same tetter-totter. Even though I've had times in my 41 year marriage where we've been too broke to meet bills, raised children, dealt with other issues, this is the most difficult time of life for me. A time when we are retired and fiancially stable, my children and their children are all flourishing.. it's still the most trying. My 84 year old mother and her care and condition is with me when I wake and even in my sleep. To top it off, our relationship has been difficult due to her lifelong mental state. That fulcrum can be difficult to locate - with the help of God, we can find it. I know it's there. Thank God for our husbands-they just may be that fulcrum.
"anubis horribilis" is what I meant to say. And now this.
I know exactly how you feel. My mom has Alzheimer's and Tuesday, when I went to see her (in a nursing home, now) she said she had to leave becasue "Bob is waiting outside in the car". Bob, my dad, died 17 years ago, last month.
Today, she seemed much more with it, and we talked about her dancing to the Glenn Miller Orchestra, in Chicago, when she was eighteen. She even ventured a guess as to where this took place.
We just have to hang on to the good days, and help them through the bad days. It does no good to try to convince them that they are mistaken. That just makes it worse. Sometimes changing the subject helps, or a diversion in activity makes them forget what they were thinking about. Sometimes perseverating about!
Nancy
Oh Judy... Please know you have my prayers and best wishes for you at this difficult time... I'm beginning to see a little of this with my dad and it is scarey... Could it be that your mom is deficient in certain vitamins or that some medication is interferring with her memory? Sometimes there is an explanation... I do hope you'll find it's a fixable one... Blessings, Debra (...and thanks for commenting at my blog!)
I'm sorry about your mom.
Yes.
I photographed a see-saw this weekend and thought about just those sort of rides.
Thank you for your kind words.
It helps. It really truly does.
This is SO much harder than I could ever have imagined.
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