What DO I Actually DO?

Some times I even worry myself about what it is that I do all day, and why it takes me all day to do it.

Mostly, as I do every winter, I am hibernating.  I do not even have to go out to get the mail, as it is dropped right into the porch.  Still, it seems like a chore I must do every day. Open the backdoor and pick up the mail.  Of course, that is only on days when Feintjse isn't here, as getting the mail is HIS job.

Then, there is the job of letting the dog out, letting the dog in, letting the dog out.., you get the picture.  Poor Zeke thinks that I am powerful enough to open the door on a day that IS NOT bitterly cold and snowy.  So all day long he tries out his theory that there are warmer days coming.  He is wrong.  Still, he is nothing if not persistent.

One thing I am particularly good at is repurposing.  Our Buzz Lightyear lost his arm by thinking he could fly full speed into a piano.  He could not.  It is very interesting now that we can see inside of him!  It isn't the arm that makes "ptew ptew ptew" sounds, so all is well.  Buzz still works.  How could someone throw away a Buzz Lightyear that still works?  I could not.  There would be angry natives were I to do that.  So, I've called upon his severed arm to hold up my Valentine's Day balloon in a pitcher of years old artificial roses.  Notice here all the benefits for being someone who struggles with throwing things away.  The pay-off is this BEAUTIFUL display on my coffee table, unlike any other.  This, my friends, cannot be purchased in any store.

Soon I shall be posting pictures of the beautiful Valentine's I made.  Yes!  Weeks before Valentine's Day I made dozens of Valentine's.  The fun I had making them was beyond measure.  I LOVE making cards.  I purchased heavy card stock just for the occasion.  I spent several days on them, totally taking over my dining room table.  What?  You remember that I have two complete rooms in my basement for this purpose?  Well, those tables are filled with.., um.., other stuff that I have plans for.  Things like sewing projects, soap making supplies, Christmas decor, and whole bunches of what-not.  (please don't judge me.  i do that well enough myself...)  Anyway.., about those dozens of Valentine's.., I used exactly five of them.  One of them went to the love of my life, THGGM. Four of them went to some kids I know, who don't remember receiving them.  They were that good.  Quite possibly they remember the cookies that came with them, but maybe not.  They are polite children.  Since I didn't make them using Princess or Ninja Turtle stamps I'm sure they made no sense at all to the younger crowd.  Valentine's Day was a horrible day weather-wise, with not much improvement after that, I totally forgot about the remaining Valentine's and the remaining family members who did not receive them.  I also ate the remaining cookies.  So sue me.

It's possible my tombstone will read "She Meant Well".  Because truly I do.  Although it might also read, "She Had Diabetes, Yet Still Ate Cookies".  Just as an aside, the cookies were fantastic!  I use the well known Better Crocker Chocolate Chip Cookie recipe but used coconut oil in place of the shortening.  I also threw in slivered almonds.  I never get the seven dozen it says it will yield, but who's counting?

Speaking of coconut oil, I LOVE that stuff!  I've been making batches of lotion bars using coconut oil, a small amount of olive oil, and lavender essential oil.  I've also made a few using peppermint oil.  Feintsje loves those.  Most days we smell like candy canes over here.

And for those who are wondering, I have learned to play The Hokey-Pokey on the piano.  It's great fun in a small space with a half dozen children throwing themselves about.  It's not quite on the same par as Beethoven or Bach, but then those are more difficult to dance around to.  Which reminds me, I heard Kado singing the Hallelujah Chorus yesterday and was VERY impressed.  He was even more impressed that  I knew that song.  So, as I am wont to do, I told him how I knew that song, and how everyone stands up when it is played or sung.  To this he responded that mine must be a different song, because his was from a movie and nobody stood up.  I am sooo out of touch.  This probably has something to do with hibernating all winter (and much of the other seasons as well...).

Oh!  And have I mentioned yet that I finished reading Charlotte Bronte's novel Villette?  I did.  It took me months of picking it up and putting it down, but I did finish it.  I did not like it at all.  I especially did not like how it ended.  Not at all the "Dear Reader, I married him." I was hoping for.  So, for obvious reasons I am now reading Jane Eyre, which I love.  Since by day I read Sandra Boynton board books, I look forward to crawling into bed with a good novel.  Not that Sandra Boynton books aren't great, but she is no Charlotte Bronte.  But then, Charlotte didn't draw cute talking animals.., so there's that...

Yesterday I discovered a new favorite thing to do.  While Feintsje slooooowly ate his lunch, I lingered at the table with him.  While sipping on my third cup of coffee (i had cut down, but goodness is it ever COLD) I began drawing monkey faces.  Do you think I could make a career out of that?  It is just sooo fun!  If you are in need of a monkey face, I would be happy to draw some for you.  Of course, I am sure pictures will follow, as I am weird that way (and oh so many other ways...).  But seriously,  monkey faces.  Do you need any?  They don't look professional at all, but couldn't that be the charm?  Actually, they aren't of any sort of quality.  But, one must constantly be on the lookout for ways to remain sane in the bitter cold of a Michigan winter.  As a side note, I cannot draw a side view of a monkey face.  I've tried.

Because, the only other thing that I am good at, and it doesn't look hopeful for employment either, is cheerleading.  Not the kind of cheerleading one usually thinks of as cheerleading.  No.  I have never understood that kind.  Now that I am aware that I am a Myers/Briggs INTJ I understand why I have never liked it.  It is because it is impossible for me to let someone manipulate my emotions.  Nope.  Not going to let that happen.  So if YOU want to jump all around, go ahead.  I won't judge you (wait.., yes i will, i just won't mention that i am.).  No.  I am not that kind of cheerleader.  No pom-poms.  No jumping up and down, and definitely no splits.  But, I can be found sitting on the edge of my pretty pink bathtub in my pretty pink bathroom encouraging young humans to "Give me a P, give me an O, give me another O, give me another P, what does it spell?"  One of these young humans, who shall remain nameless so he will continue to love me throughout all time and eternity, has a funny little habit of saying in an extremely sweet and endearing voice "I love you Beppe" when he is about to poop.  But since he doesn't want to go, I have to read the cues.  This has caused a serious crisis in my life.  Now, whenever someone says to me "I love you" (yes, it does happen) I am sooo tempted to say, "Are you pooPING?"  This is my life.  I am a poop cheerleader, and dawgoneit, people like me.

In other news, I have caught a cold.  It is causing great crankiness and bouts of coughing.  Other than that, Dear Reader, I am fine.