So, How Have You Been?

This week I have taken a serious inventory of what is wrong here.

A lot. Yes. A lot is wrong.

I remembered that when one finally surfaces from feeling depressed long enough to look around and notice that there are still lives going on in one's proximity, it is best to go back to what worked before to bring one out of it.

Already I had unearthed my "Inside Out" book. This is a painful bugger of a book to read. I first read it in the early nineteen nineties. In the book I actually found a copy of the building request form I had filled out when four friends and myself set out to work through this book together. Two of them I know FOR SURE WITHOUT ANY DOUBT would NEVER read this book again. Not that they didn't like it. It's just not an easy read. Another would never read it again because she just could not believe that there wasn't an easy answer for everything. I think she only joined our study to try to help us poor little things out with her vast array of religious cliches.

I found the book life-changing.

It was also at a point in my life when I underlined everything I found helpful as I read. This time through, I'm seriously wondering what caused me to underline some of the stuff I did. Today, if I was still into underlining - and I am not - I would be choosing totally different things.

So, I'm one third of the way through, and from there I will move on to "Finding God", by the same author (Larry Crabb). Then, it's on to Leanne Payne. On top of this, I still have "My Utmost for His Highest" at hand - my beloved 'coaster' copy that is underlined, highlighted. dog-eared and nearly falling apart.

I must also add to my reading list something about the death of hormones, as I seem to have either misplaced mine, or they died. Does this cause one to feel like one can no longer find oneself? I've been looking, but I do not know where I am. Maybe I will pick up clues from what I underlined in the past.

I've also quit drinking vast and copious amounts of coffee (it has always been easy for me to give up that which i have thrown up). I would like to think that is helping too. That leaves me tired, which is a side effect of my medication. But, since it is SUPPOSED to do that, drinking coffee was working against it. Or, so it would seem.

Tonight I am fighting with a migraine. I refuse to give in. And, I refuse to take the medication for that, which is about the same as coffee, but without the bitter after taste.

Some people believe there is a God when he appears to answer their requests for things.

I know there is a God. He sent a robin family to nest outside my window. Right where I can see them.

Me, the one with the blog about having an empty nest.

He knows me.