Anybody Home

Yes. My old westie has made it to the ripe old age of sixteen. She is really happy today. When I woke her up I told her that she was officially old enough to date now. There is a fire in the fireplace in her honor. Daughter, Youngest Son and I got Chinese takeout for lunch in honor of her birthday. I even shared some with her. Now, in honor of her birthday, I think that I will take a nap before I go to work.

Tomorrow is the birthday of The Husband God Gave Me. In honor of HIS birthday, I will let him take the whole family out for breakfast. Yes. That will be wonderful.

Daughter visited the doctor today. Seems those back pains and stomach cramps she has been having this week were labor pains.

She is partially effaced and dialated one centimeter.

Hmmm. They sttarted the day after she worked a 10 hour shift.

She's been put on bedrest. What she is actually doing at the moment is going camping three hours north of here. She says that will be restful. She says they have a cellphone.

Next week begins her third trimester.

I feel sick.

Today I finished reading "Taking Care of Dad" by John B. Reynolds. It's a true story of how the author gave up his job to move his ailing father into his home to take care of him. Excellent story.

I'm also reading "Pilgrim at Tinker Creek" by Annie Dillard. It's also excellent, yet, sort of gross reading about bugs and stuff before going to bed.

Yesterday I finished "Covenant Marriage" by Gary Chapman. I'm not a fan of books on marriage. This one isn't bad, I bought it for the church library, and will happily recommend it. But, the ONLY book on marriage that I actually would recommend that anyone buy, is Walter Wangerin's "As for Me and My House". This book is worth it, even if only for his descriptions of the various couples out for Saturday night dinner at Denny's.

I'm also ripping apart books. This is a very difficult thing for me. But, I am decoupaging the card box from the library, and I think it would look good with some words from a book on it. So, I rip.

Presently, I am reading Peggy Noonan's "Simply Speaking". But, mostly I am just thumbing my way through that. I will NEVER give a speech, so I'm just reading it because it cost me a quarter. One of my favorite books is filled with speeches from history - not just the memorable parts, but the entire speech. It is called "Lend Me Your Ears".

Next up is Maeve Binchy's "Evening Class". I've not read her before. I actually bought this one because I liked the cover. Sometimes I can be SO shallow.

What are you reading?

Now remember, I do not think that I am very interesting. One of the purposes of my on line journal is to keep me ever aware of the fact that I am boring. I am. I own that.

This morning, I wrote a very provocative post, and lost my connection - and my post. I can't be provocative when I am angry. Maybe it will come back to me, but, I highly doubt it.

I also wrote about a scary car incident that happened with Daughter driving. I cannot relive that at the moment. It too, is gone.

So, this is what I've got.

I'm spray painting things black. Black is my mood lately.

I'm tossing books from the church library. Church libraries (at least mine) contain a plethora of books that no one wanted at home, so they donated them. But, I did get some great videos and DVD's donated. The month AFTER I eliminated all videos from the library. Just two years ago I removed a book for teen boys that actually stated that masterbation can cause blindness. No one had ever checked this book out. Now I wish I had kept it. I could have put it in the blind section.

I'm freakishly confused and upset lately. Is this the result of being a woman in her 40's? Or, as my family can attest, am I just realizing that I am ALWAYS freakishly confused and upset?

Surrounded by hundreds (i kid you not) of magazines, I want to look at magazines, but not these. I want to look at a magazine that hasn't been created yet. And I want it now.

I'd like to finish something. Accomplish something. Anything.

I'm off to make cookies. Chocolate chip cookies with 1/4 cup of malted milk stirred into the batter. Yum. These are good.

Or, maybe I'll just sit here and ponder my life.

Although, that would be best to do with a new magazine and a chocolate chip cookie.

Yes. Yes, it would.

Note to self: ALWAYS carry your own books and magazines to appointments.

This morning, all of our original family members where in the house at the same time. This rarely happens. Especially on a Monday morning.

Once they all left to their various lives, I took my mom to her morning bone scan and afternoon mammagram. It was there that I realized just how tired I was.

At the bone scan appointment, I read a months old TIME magazine. How boring is that? Judge Reinquist was still alive and being quoted, and Katrina was just some girl down the street. What kept me awake was that I had to go to the bathroom. But, if I left the waiting room, I might have lost my mom somewhere in the hallowed halls of Spectrum Blodget.

I tried to find something interesting to buy in the hospital gift shop that I could read while waiting in the mammagram waiting room, but, after I knocked over a bunch of stuff in there, I thought it best if I just go quietly.

It seems so weird to me that the Betty Ford Breast Cancer Center had the saddest supply of magazines ever. Even worse then my dad's eye doctor, who has all money and boating magazines.

They had a lot of golf magazines, and stacks of Field and Stream. Really. I became almost silly tired. I did read the parenting magazine my mom was looking at once she was called back. Miss Manner's was a delight, as usual.

My mother could sense how tired I was while driving home, and even asked if I'd like her to pinch me.

Between the appointments, we ran into someone I knew since elementary school. She was thin. I never did like her much anyway.

Now that I am home, and have downed a mug of coffee, I still cannot wake up! But, I am enjoying my front porch. I never sit on it in the summer, but once fall comes, I just love it. And, the wireless from the coffee shop comes in SO much better out here.

But, I'm still tired. And boring.

I wonder what it looks like, this large tired woman on her front porch using a laptop while reclining in a metal baby crib turned porch furniture? I'm sure it looks odd. But, one does hit a point of tiredness where one just does not care.

I am there.

I'm entertaining myself by using the "English from the Roots Up" cards that I bought.

I'm rather sure that I'm annoying everyone around me, but I am having a great time.

Today I mastered the Greek words in my set. This would not be a stretch for most people, I know, but for my hormone deficient 47 year old brain, it is. This same brain has continued to struggle with a migraine, and the incessant hammerings of the lone roofing man.

If I remember correctly, I used to be a nice person.

Now, I am a formerly nice person, with a migraine, who has mastered a handful of Greek words.

I don't get out much.

(spell check is firewall protected on this computer, and if there is one thing i haven't mastered, it is spelling - i KNOW which words are spelled incorrectly, i just haven't a clue what to do about it)

Mouse number three in the dog water bowl. But this one lives. The cat batted it out of the bowl, but did not catch it.

Just now I went into my kitchen, where I spent the day making cookies and being generally domestic, and there it stood right on my stove. It calmly smiled at me, and then disappeared into a burner.

Who has a room for me? One with padded walls, calming classical music, and chocolate...

Sunday morning I awoke early and went to the door to let the dog out. Next thing I know I am letting out a shrill scream. There is a mouse swimming in the dog's water bowl. Doggy-paddling in circles.

The Husband God Gave Me took care of the situation for me.

Monday morning I was awakened by Youngest Son, who told me that there was ANOTHER mouse swimming in the dog's water bowl. I asked him to take care of it. He told THGGM.

Monday morning I went to the door to let the dog out. Next thing I know I am letting out a shrill scream. There is a mouse STILL swimming in the dog's water bowl. Doggy-paddling in circles. Youngest Son will not do a thing about it. THGGM apparently thought it was more important to be on time for his blood test at the lab.

The Husband God Gave Me took care of the situation for me, albeit, a little late.

Monday afternoon, Daugther and I are lounging in the living room with our coffee in hand. We are tired from a day filled with shopping for cute little baby things. Suddenly, the cat comes racing into the living room. Daughter begins the shrill screaming, while standing on the couch next to me. I promptly put my magazine in front of my face. She called out the play by play.

"It's on my shoe! He has it in his mouth! The dog has it in her mouth! It's in his mouth! It's in her mouth! It's behind the dresser! There it is again! It's not moving! It's moving now!" (feel free to repeat this a few times).

She called Son-in-law, who promptly removed it from the premise. Son-in-law is a real man. A man amongst men. My hero.

Both swimming mice were adults. This latest one was not. Are you thinking what I'm thinking? I'm thinking that these mice looked around at the condition this world is in and decided to only have one child. Yes. That's what I'm thinking.

In the mean time, I'm keeping Son-in-law's number handy.

(the nice man who is roofing my house felt led to tell me last week that he saw evidence of rodents on the roof - apparently he wasn't just making chit-chat. apparently the mice packed up and moved south.)

That is what my life is all about. Or, so it seems. I am always surrounded by piles and piles of books.

I recently lowered my piles and piles of books in the church library by getting over fifty ready for circulation. I have more than that still to go, and I carried over a new stack of 12 yesterday.

I have a large stack of music books to go through. I found dozens and dozens of old piano books for 10 cents, and just could not pass them up. If you have ever purchased music books, they are EXPENSIVE, and usually contain only a few songs that I'm actually interest in. I do not know what I'm going to do with them, except maybe start a music book section in the church library. I might roll an old piano in there too. Just dreaming out loud here...

Friday I found a Robert Louis Stevenson "A Child's Garden of Verses" illustrated by Tasha Tudor. For 10 cents. I also found a lot of stuff I wanted to have when I home schooled, but could not afford them at the time. So, I now own the first set of "English from the Roots Up" cards. I passed on a newer edition of Saxon algebra, for 25 cents. I think that if someone stumbled into my house from the street, they would think they had landed in a library. Suprisingly enough, I haven't "Dewey Decimaled" my private collection, but I seem to know where everything is. (everything is in a pile...somewhere...)

This week I finished reading "Gilead" by Marilynne Robinson. It is wonderful. Tonight I start "Pilgrim at Tinker Creek" by Annie Dillard. I'm still in the middle of reading four others.

I have friends who haven't a visible book in their homes. I just don't understand. I try. But, I just don't understand. The Husband God Gave Me understands. He is envious of those friends.

I feel deep sadness for the victims of hurricane Katrina. I feel deep sadness for the victims of the flooding when the levy broke. But, I feel something more intense than deep sadness for the victims of the criminals who preyed upon the people during this time of unbelievable pain, loss and confusion.

One of the bodies found in the 'dead body room' at the New Orleans Convention Center was that of a seven year old girl. Her throat was slit.

As my mind frantically attempts to sort out the terribleness of natural dissasters, man made bunglings of waterways, and the whole problem of logistics in organizing aid, there is just NO PLACE to put the needless murder of a little girl.

Someone tell me when we are going to begin to put away criminals and either actively work to rehabilitate them, or lock them up and throw away the key.

I have never felt that the citizenry should be armed. But, if I were the parent of the seven year old girl, I could have thought of a place or two to point my gun.

Yes, I know, there but for the grace of God go I. But still.

How did this happen?

I used to have a friend named Jan. We had an enormous amount of fun in high school. For about two years, we dated guys who were friends. I married my guy, she dumped hers.

But, before all that, she had a mad crush on this guy named Mike. Jan had a car. I had the use of my dad's car, a 1966 Buick LaSabre. Here car was cooler.

One night we were out driving around. She was hoping to catch a glimpse of Mike as she drove past his house. She saw a male in the window, and said, "Is that him, or his dad?" I only heard the first part, and replied, "Yah"! (being the dutch girls that we are, i'm sure what i said was 'jah'.) Anyway...

This caused Jan to start screaming "Yah, who? Yah, who? Yah, who?" Of course, in her mind, she heard it the way she meant it. What I heard sounded more like something that a cowboy would yell at a rodeo. I laughed until I nearly passed out.

She still didn't get it.

When she finally did, she drove off the road.

Somedays, I miss her.

Okay, I'll go first. List five of your indiosyncrasies. Of course, mine are catagorized, but these are the five I will throw out there for all the world to see (all 31 of you).

NUMBER 5 - I love quiet. A bit is shaved off my life every time I have to listen to a radio in the car. And if the station gets flipped back and forth, a bit more of my life - gone early.

NUMBER 4 - All my clothes and hangers MUST all go in the same direction in my closet. Clothes on the floor? Not so much of a bother. But the clothes and hangers MUST all always be in order.

NUMBER 3 - Sometimes I have to say things, even if you already know it. Like, 'be sure to lock the door when you come in'. I know you know that. I still have to say it. EVERY TIME. Just deal with it.

NUMBER 2 - I collect stuff. A lot of stuff. I have no idea why. I think it's a disease. I hope there is a pill.

NUMBER 1 - I continue to work at things that I'm no good at. I practice the piano, yet have never conquired timing. I draw, yet it all seems to lack something. I sew, and it's all crooked. I rubberstamp, but I can't seem to get things centered correctly. Does this make me an optimist? Or, is that where the 'idio' in idiosyncrasies comes from?

I remember my dad and other neighbor men affectionately calling a neighbor boy 'Moochie'. This kid had an uncany way of getting stuff from other people without stealing it. If he were smaller, they most likely would have named him 'Borrower'. I can't even remember what his real name was, as he was just 'Moochie' to me.

Today, I fit the title well. I'm on Youngest Son's laptop, while he takes a group of middle school students to their afternoon of fitness training at the YMCA. I'm also mooching wireless service from the coffee shop across the street from me. I have gone there for coffee, and would more often if it wasn't for the simple fact that the ice cream shoppe comes first. First in my footsteps and first in my heart.

Not having a car all week, I also have resorted to mooching rides from people. This I find the most humiliating thing I have to do. But, with the current price of gas, it's wonderful to open the door and in just a few steps, be at work.

Yes. That's me. 'Mooch'.

The "Church Law & Tax Report" has excellent material available for churches. Twelve years ago we implimented this at our church. There now exists an even newer resourse for churches titled "Reducing the Risk II - Making Your Church Safe from Child Sexual Abuse".

Next time you are at church, ask a board member if you have a policy in place which is actually followed. If yes, thank them! If no, get busy making sure that not another week goes by without it.

You can thank me later.

I have passed through many strange emotions today. I can't take a drink of water without being extremely thankful that I have water to drink. We ran out of coffee here today, and it didn't seem like the tragedy it usually does. Several things that would normally have really annoyed me, suddenly seem like blessings. You know the feeling?

I have been waiting for Michael's Craft Store to have a 50% off coupon so I could get something for which I've been waiting for months. I bought it. But, the thrill is gone.

Sometimes, if the wind is just so, my neighborhood catches a stench from the waste/water treatment plant. Tonight, I'm going to breathe deeply of the fresh night air. Air which doesn't contain the rotting stench of my neighbors dead bodies.

Tuesday, we are getting a new roof. It's been annoying to have leaky rooms when it rains really hard. In two days, that problem will be solved. How many months, if not years, will some people have to wait to 'go home', wherever that will be?

I have a rather extensive collection of books. They all mean something to me. I can barely get rid of even the duplicates I've collected. I hear that most people being lifted out of rooms after days of waiting are happy to be leaving with their Bibles. I couldn't find my Bible when I went to leave for church at seven this morning.

Having three children, I did my share of moaning and complaining bringing them into this world. I hear there was a baby born on an overpass this week. They tied the cord with a shoestring, and sterlized a pocket knife with lighters to cut the cord. They had no water. I can't even imagine this. I don't even want to try.

My dad is overwhelmed by the thought of how it's people his age that are dying. He knows he wouldn't last long without his medication. I wonder how noninsulin diabetics like myself faired without food or water?

What if I was separated from my children? I can't even begin to imagine this!

It does us well to remember that these events are called disasters for a reason. They ARE disasterous. There is no one to blame.

www.liquidpaper.typepad.com

Laurie's polymer clay pins are SO cute! I especially love the Boston Terrier, as my Grandparents always had Boston Terriers when I was a kid. Laurie sells her pins and they are wonderful little works of art!

Her husband also has a great blog, which you can link to from Laurie's blog.

12 eggs
3 cups half and half
4 slices bread, cubed
1 tsp. salt
Pepper to taste
Onion to taste
2 cups broccoli florettes, cooked and cooled
Precooked ham slice, cubed
1 cup grated Swiss cheese (I sometimes add more)

Beat eggs and half and half, add remaining ingredients. Store in covered bowl overnight. Bake in 9x13 prepared pan for approximately 55 minutes, at 350 degrees. Let sit for 10 minutes before cutting. Serves 12.